9 Guaranteed Ways to Win When you think "I'm Failing as a Teacher"
I feel like I’m failing as a teacher. I feel like I’m failing as a teacher and I’m drowning. I wrote those words and many others explaining my feelings one Friday, not too long ago, sitting in my classroom at about 5:55 p.m. after spending hours working. I wrote it after a long week teaching virtually and in person and I meant every word of it. It is weeks later, a new year has started and after much trial and error and making some changes, I do not struggle as much with the feeling that I am failing as a teacher.
You might be thinking, “It’s natural to feel like you’re failing, especially for teachers who have so much to do. You may think it’s even more understandable that I feel that way, especially right now, with all the current challenges that teachers, and many others, are facing. For me, however, feeling as if I’m failing as a teacher did not feel natural.
Why didn’t the feeling that I am failing as a teacher feel natural? Well, I am a veteran teacher. This is year fifteen in my teaching career. I have bachelor of arts degrees in English and Spanish, a master of education degree in early childhood education and a Ph.D. in curriculum and instruction. It is always my goal to be an excellent teacher: to inspire, to care, to motivate, to challenge and to, well, get the job done right, but this school year, for months I couldn't shake the thought or feeling that I’m failing as a teacher.
You know what makes the fact that I feel that I’m failing as a teacher hard to swallow? It’s several things actually. First, I am coming in early and leaving late, like at 5:30 p.m. or later every afternoon late. Second, I am painstakingly replying to emails, texts and Remind messages from students and parents. Third, I am updating my Google Classroom with detailed steps and printable resources, learning and using well researched instructional tools, recording videos and lessons for my students and hosting twice daily Google Meets lessons, all while juggling my in person students. Most importantly, I am constantly wracking my brain to think of fun, but virtual; hands on, but accessible, experiences for ALL my students, regardless of whether they are in class or virtual, but still I feel that I’m failing as a teacher.
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Why do I feel that I’m failing as a teacher?
Well, I’ll explain. I feel that I'm failing as a teacher because I cannot fix the child’s mic at home that will not work. I feel that I'm failing as a teacher because there are times when I cannot make my view board share its screen to the virtual students at home or make the internet connect or comfort my student/s whose experiment did not work.
I feel that I’m failing as a teacher because I cannot make the young child in class understand why I tend to call on the student/s at home, while we're having a joint lesson, to help them feel connected to the class. I feel that I’m failing as a teacher because I need to go and check my email at times to help walk a student through how to turn in their work when there may be a student in the room wanting my attention right then.
I definitely feel that I am failing as a teacher and a mom because I cannot help my own child to understand. I feel that I'm failing as a teacher because I can't make him understand why we must get to school so early and leave so late and why he has to let mommy work at her computer to check the emails, update her Google Classroom and record the videos.
Now, I think you fully understand why I feel that I’m failing as a teacher. Maybe you feel like I do, too. At least that is the way I was feeling, but then I came to a realization on another Friday at about 6:00 p.m. That day, I was walking with my 4 year old, out of the building, after talking with a parent who was at the end of his rope from trying to help his virtual student get through online learning. Here is what I realized.
Coming to a realization about feeling that I am failing as a teacher
That Friday, I realized that I had to fight the feeling that I am failing as a teacher. I realized that I had to try to see things differently. I realized that despite all of the challenges and things that don't go as planned that I am a great teacher who is doing her absolute best to swim in the worst of times. I realized that I could only pray that my parents see my heart and my efforts. I realized that I had to take heart in the smiles and feedback I received from students and parents who recognized how hard I was working. I realized that it was important that I didn't entertain the feeling that I’m failing as a teacher because that would definitely affect my ability to teach well.
Having these thoughts and this internal struggle made me want to create this post to help other educators who may be feeling like failures as teachers. Here are my 7 Guaranteed ways to Win When You Think “I’m Failing as a Teacher.”
1. Take Care of Yourself
The number one thing you need to do when you think “I’m failing as a teacher” is to take care of yourself. If you’re anything like me those thoughts will drive you to work more, not eat or eat whatever is handy, which may not be the healthiest, sleep less due to worry, and before you know it, you will be of no use to yourself, much less to your students and their parents.